Being Independent

As I watch my little girl grow more and more each day, I see her independence strengthen by the minute and I realise quickly that the young girl I see in front of me is just a pint sized version of myself. From a young age I've always been fairly independent. My parents raised me to be a strong and independent young woman.

Unfortunately sometimes I think perhaps I'm too independent, it's not always a positive trait. I struggle to ask others for help, for I am too proud and have to do everything myself. Yesterday as someone offered to give me a hand carrying my bags I politely declined and then I heard a little parrot pipe in "we're all good, thanks" at 2, she is already turning down assistance and insisting on doing everything on her own. I suppose I should at least be grateful that she used her manners!

I often find it hard to let others in, sure I have amazing friends but I often keep them at an arms length and don't share a lot of my feelings with them. I'd rather people see me as strong and independent with no weaknesses. I often believe that the reason I am single is because I'm too independent, I like my life the way it is, I like doing what I want and went I want. Perhaps that's just known as selfishness as opposed to being independent, maybe.

I'm self sufficient and have been for a long time, I earn my own money, I can change a tyre on my car, I can fix my bike, in most aspects of life I'm pretty good at fending for myself. I've always thought it's a great thing to be self sufficient and independent but as I watch my little girl grow I realise that it's not all it's cracked up to be. It's my job to teach her that independence is good, but it's also good to let others in to help you. Don't put up you wall so high that no one  can ever climb over, don't keep your friends at arms length, let them in for the good and the bad. Be self sufficient but don't be too proud to be resourceful and seek help from those around you.

A letter to all women...

Pour yourself a glass of wine and raise a toast to yourself, for you are truly amazing. As women we seem to have so much pressure on us, yet 99% of this pressure comes from ourselves. We cause ourselves so much stress and angst yet we continue to do it to ourselves. We need to stop! We don't need to be perfect, we shouldn't have to be!

To all the mums out there, don't worry if your house is untidy and your kids covered in dirt. This just means your children are having fun, houses and kids aren't meant to be too clean. Remember it's all just immunity building!

Don't feel guilty for leaving your children in care whilst you go off to work. You are teaching them equality, it's okay for both mums and dads to work outside of the home. If you are a stay at home mum don't feel guilty when people ask you what you do for work. Don't say you don't work, you do! You have an extremely important job, household manager, the most over worked and underpaid job that exists! If a job ad existed for it no one in their right mind would apply!

To the single ladies, enjoy being single, live and love life, be free and independent. Don't stress about finding mr right (he probably doesn't exist anyway). One day when your loving life he'll come along and sweep you off your feet when you least expect it.

To the dinks, if by choice then don't feel guilty for not having children, they are not for everyone and you shouldn't feel pressured by family and society to have them. Enjoy all the things that couples with children never have time to do!

To the dinks that are desperately praying for that bundle of joy, enjoy your full nights sleep and your peaceful romantic dinners. You'll get that baby one day, even if it's not the smooth journey you hoped for. When the day does arrive you'll appreciate it even more.

To the mums with loving husbands, it's okay to hate them sometimes. After all they can be huge pains in the bums. As long as you love them more than hate them then it's ok!! 

To the single mums, hats off to you, it's not an easy job but remember you don't have that grown up hairy child to care for as well!

So whatever your situation, relax, take some of that pressure of yourself. Ignore that growing pile of laundry in the corner, it will still be there tomorrow, let the kids run around naked in the backyard (at least then they're not contributing to the pile of laundry), let that husband of yours cook his own dinner, go out dancing with the girls and forget about mr right.

Love yourself, you are truly an amazing woman who does an amazing job every day of the week no matter what that job may be. Make sure you not only love yourself but all of the other women in your lives, remind them each and every day of just how amazing they are!

So cheers, I raise my glass of wine (so much for detox) to you!

Detoxing Disaster

So after far too much indulging in good food and wine over the Christmas period and then eating far too many chocolates at work last week (blaming stress!) I felt it necessary to undergo a mini detox. My face was breaking out in pimples, my jeans were starting to feel a tad bit snug and I was generally feeling run down and lathargic!

I got organized on the weekend stocking up on healthy foods, ridding the house of any bad foods and setting myself 3 goals for the week: Stick to all of my exercise plans, drink at least 2L of water a day and start each day with a glass of water with lemon juice. I recently read that the 3 things successful people do each day are rise early, exercise first thing and drink a glass of water with lemon. I figured I was ticking 2 of those boxes so why not add a third by drinking lemon juice!

To help further kick start my detox I decided to order some flat tummy tea which consists of an activate tea that you take each morning and a cleanse tea that you take every second night. 2 days into my detox plan I realised that there is a reason you follow the instructions on the cleansing detox tea. When it says to brew one teaspoon in hot water for 3-5 mins it's probably not a good idea to brew one tablespoon (my bad) for 35 minutes (may have just got slightly distracted). This mishap took place on Monday evening with the effects being noticed the following evening, severe stomach cramps followed by an evening in the loo!

Asides from this slight disaster by all accounts my detox is going great. I'm drinking at least 2 litres of water a day, leading to about 5 extra trips to the bathroom, really not convinced on the benefits of all this extra water when it seems to just go straight through me. I've exercised every day even if it's meant getting up at 4.30 in the morning, resulting in my daily caffeine fix being upgraded to a large, extra strong (and ok my detox isn't proper because I didn't give up caffeine, but I do need to function after 12pm!) I've drank my lemon juice each morning too, yet not noticing any effects of being more successful!

My skin is loving me, my abs are starting to reappear and asides from being ready for bed by 8pm I'm feeling pretty awesome! It's amazing what a little detox can do, just no more brewing detox tea for 35 mins, oven timer now set!!

Feeling Alive

Funnily enough it's the 3 things in the title of my blog that make me the happiest! Biking, baking and of course my baby (despite her really not being a baby anymore). After a week where I have at times felt quite down and angry with myself for feeling that way I needed to get out of my rut. Maybe it's the post holiday blues or the fact that I seem to know a million people that got engaged over the festive season that has got me feeling a little down. So this morning I jumped on the bike and pedaled, I probably wouldn't have actually got out of bed if it hadn't have been for the fact that I committed to meet a friend to cycle. The last thing I felt like doing this morning was ride, but I wasn't about to let my friend down! I warned her that I'd probably be a bit slow given the extreme exhaustion I felt after a week of sleepless nights. Once I started riding though I felt great, the further we cycled the better I felt, we rode along the beach through the hills at Mt Martha and I truly felt alive. I hadn't cycled down there since ironman training and had forgotten how truly beautiful it was. Before I knew it I was smashing those hills and powering along as though trying to prove something to myself. I managed to leave my buddies for dead at one point (sorry Sez and Lou!) and they remembered what it was like to ride with the little mountain goat!! Maybe it was all of the excess sugar that I consumed yesterday that provided me with all of the energy or maybe I aren't quite as unfit as I think I am! 

I'm feeling slightly exhausted and my legs somewhat numb but boy do I feel alive and realize just how much I love getting out on the bike, having time for me, releasing all of my negative thoughts and self doubt and just catching up with good friends as we pedal along.